How to Help Your Child See Their Strengths

A person's sense of self-worth is not fixed; it can be boosted or decreased. With children, you can help them develop their self-esteem and confidence by teaching them about the world around them.

To help children develop a growth mindset, these activities are not all specific to self-esteem, but they encourage children to be confident in who they are.‍

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1. ‘I am…’ activity: Is your child proud of their accomplishments, or do they tend to be overly critical of themselves? With this activity, you can investigate the issue.

‍How to:

• Ask your child to write down the words that best describe them. It can be both positive and negative.
• Then ask them to focus only on the good things that people have said about them and make a list of that.
• Draw or chart paper and place the child's photo at its center.
• Ask the child to fill the area around the picture with positive words, adjectives that she can relate to.
• The drawing sheet or paper should be placed in her room so that she can continue to reinforce her positive self-image.

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2. Make a list of all of your accomplishments in life: Encourage the child's self-esteem by reminding them of their achievements.

How to: 

• Give your child a notebook or a pen and paper.
• Start by writing down the list of successes in life on the front page, leaving space at the bottom to add more later. 
• You can also ask the child to write down her successes each night before she goes to sleep in order to remind her of her potential.
• Focus on the fact that failures are not only acceptable, but necessary. Do not forget to acknowledge your child's efforts when they successfully overcome a difficult situation.‍

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3. ‘I am afraid but…’: For children, fear is a natural state of mind. To help children overcome their fears, we've put together this activity.‍

How to:

• Instruct your child to make a list of all the things she is afraid of doing. For instance, she could be afraid to go to swimming classes. Or perhaps she is terrified of giving a class presentation.

The sentences should be something like this.

-'I am afraid to enroll in the swim team because …'

-'Talking to so-and-so makes me nervous because…'

• This is the second step, which is to imagine yourself doing the thing you're afraid of. Think about signing up for a swim team or talking to that person. 
• Whenever a child writes down something they're afraid of, ask them to write down all the possible outcomes if they tried it. And next to the negative outcome, get them to write something about possible positive outcomes. 

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4. ‘I Trust You…’: When a child knows that someone believes in them, their self-esteem increases rapidly. It's a great way to show your child that you have faith in their abilities by giving them a task to complete.

 How to:

• Make a list of what your child can do to help the environment and the animals around them. As an example, refraining from harming the street dogs, watering the plants, and not dumping plastic in the street are just a few.
• Every time the child completes the task successfully, compliment them but do not overdo it.
• Allow them to make mistakes and assist them in correcting them without dwelling on the mistake. As a parent, you can help your child build self-confidence by assigning them chores.

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5. Get creative and come up with your own recipe: Encourage your child to view mistakes as opportunities for growth, rather than failures..

How to:

• Ask your child to come up with their own method of poaching an egg, and encourage them to make mistakes.
• Then, have them write down a list of all the ingredients and the quantities they will need.
• Don't get in the way, but keep an eye on things to make sure nothing harmful is consumed. Don't be afraid to experiment even if your child adds an unusual ingredient to the recipe (like spices or colors).
• After cooking a poached-egg, ask, “What could you have done differently?” Then, allow your child to modify the recipe and try again.‍

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6. It's okay to float your own boat: Problem solving is an excellent way to boost one's self-esteem. Open-ended challenges are a great way to get your child's brains working.‍

How to:

• For a fun activity, you can give your child a variety of recyclables, such as milk jugs, cardboard, glass jars, containers- and challenge them to build a boat.
• Provide tape, glue, string…and nothing else! Allow them to experiment with different methods of assembling their boat.
• Then they should put their creation into a lake or pond to see how it performs there. In addition, this is also a great team-building exercise.‍

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7. An Accomplishments Box is a must:  To help your child recognize their own strengths, try this simple activity.
How to:

• Store certificates, photos, and other artifacts they've made at school or in youth groups in a large enough box.
• Discuss with the child what kinds of things they would like to put in the box. It should include not only medals for winning, but also certificates or recognition for the extra effort put in.
• Over the course of a semester or school year, add objects to the box.
• Check in with your child on a regular basis, asking them how they've progressed since you last spoke with them. 

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‍Some Myth and Actual Facts 

1. Myth: It is a common myth that you cannot influence your baby's confidence because he does not yet understand what you say.

Truth: If your facial expression is disapproving or your tone of voice is negative, I believe that babies will pick up on that, even though they may not understand what you're saying. It's a good idea to treat your baby and his body with respect and enthusiasm.

Make an effort to converse with him during his meals rather than talking on the phone all of the time. Cheer and hug your baby over and over again when he or she accomplishes a new milestone.

2. Myth: Because the world is rife with frustrations, it is beneficial for children to experience them. That's a bit like saying that it's a cold, cruel world so your child should learn to sleep without blankets.

Truth: The truth is that your child will naturally develop the ability to handle increasing amounts of frustration and anxiety as he takes on more difficult challenges. However, those frustrations are a natural part of growing up and will be present in abundance throughout one's life. There is absolutely no benefit to exposing your child to additional frustration or a negative experience at any time. In fact, he will interpret your actions as evidence of your lack of concern, which is always translated in his mind as a lack of value, and which, as a result, will undermine his confidence.

3. Myth: Your child will never develop self-confidence if you always assist him in everything he needs to do.

Truth: To build your baby's self-esteem, you need to challenge him in a way that is appropriate for his age and stage. As an example, let's say your 10-month-old is having a difficult time standing up. For the sake of making him feel like he's doing it all on his own, lend a helping hand with your arm. Gradually remove your arm from his side over the next few days or weeks until he's standing like a pro and beaming with self-assurance.

With the belief that they can overcome their own mistakes and accomplish tasks, your child will be able to take on new challenges in school and life with confidence. It's impossible to unlock a child's self-confidence with one activity, but those given ideas will help you get started. The key to helping your child trust in their abilities is to look for opportunities to challenge them and then to let them seek solutions on their own.